Stamford
How the Stamford group works, and what we search there.
See the Stamford page →Are We Dating The Same Guy · Long Island
Are you in the Long Island group?
The Long Island “Are We Dating The Same Guy” group is private and women-only, so you can’t look for yourself. We search it for you, along with the groups around it, and email you a written report within 24 hours.
New York Result in 24 hours
Largest group in Facebook search: Are We Dating The Same Guy? | Long Island / Suffolk / Nassau · about 58K members
The Long Island group
(01)“Are We Dating The Same Guy” is a network of private Facebook groups, each one tied to a city or region. Women join the group for where they live, post a photo or a screenshot of a man they’ve met or matched with, and ask whether anyone else knows him. Here is how that works in Long Island.
Nassau, Suffolk and one long island
Long Island’s main group names both counties, and about 58,000 members belong to it. That’s a wide territory. Nassau, closest to the city, is dense and suburban, with towns like Garden City, Hempstead and Massapequa running into one another. Suffolk stretches much further, from Huntington and Babylon out to the farms of the North Fork and the beaches of the South Fork. People who grew up in one county often date in the other, and the group treats the whole Island as a single pool.
The LIRR and dating in the city
Plenty of Long Islanders spend their weekdays in Manhattan, riding the LIRR into Penn Station or Grand Central. A lot of them date there too. A man from Massapequa might meet women in Midtown after work, then spend his weekends back home. A post about him could just as easily appear in a New York City group as in the Long Island one, and some women belong to both.
It works the other way as well. People who moved into Queens, Brooklyn or Manhattan after college still come back to the Island for holidays, weddings and summers, and their dating lives come with them.
South Shore, North Shore and summers out east
The two shores have different feels. The South Shore has beach towns like Long Beach and a busy summer scene along the Great South Bay. The North Shore is quieter, with harbor towns along the Sound. From late spring, a lot of social life moves east to the Hamptons, Montauk and Fire Island, where people from the city and the Island share the same summer weekends. A date out east can involve someone from almost anywhere in the metro.
A place where people stay close to home
Many people on Long Island live near where they grew up, so circles overlap more than the size of the place suggests. A woman posting may have gone to school with some of the people commenting, and a post can spread from the group into group chats and back again. That’s often how a man first hears about one: secondhand, from someone who knows someone.
Where a Long Island check starts
We start with the Long Island / Suffolk / Nassau group, then turn to the New York City groups, including those covering Queens and Brooklyn, which are where a post about a Long Island man is most likely to be shared. If you also date upstate, in New Jersey or anywhere else, include it when you place your order and we’ll search those groups as well.
Whatever turns up, you’ll be working from what’s actually in the groups, not from what you’ve been told.
Why you can’t check it yourself
(02)01
It’s women-only
Admins screen people before they’re let in, and men are turned away. There is no visitor view and no way to browse from outside.
02
Nothing is public
Posts don’t show up on Google or in Facebook search outside the group. If you’re in a post, it exists only for the people inside.
03
Asking around tells people
Getting a friend to look means telling her why. Most men would rather not, and one person scrolling a busy group can easily miss a post.
What we search for Long Island
(03)- The main Long Island groupThen the groups around it, because posts are often shared on from one group to the next.
- Groups covering New York City
- Groups covering Queens and Brooklyn
- New York State-wide groups
- The Are We Dating The Same Guy appThe network now has its own app. We search that too.
How we search
By your first name and age, by the photos you upload, and by any dating app handles or nicknames you give us. Photos matter most: many posts are just a screenshot of a profile with no name attached.
What you get back
A written report by email. If something is there, you get a direct link to the post, screenshots, the date it went up, and how much attention it has had. If nothing is there, we say so plainly and list everywhere we looked.
The Tea app in Long Island
(04)Tea is the other place men get posted, and it works differently from the groups. It’s one app for the whole country rather than a group per city, but every post is filed under a location. A post about you will usually sit under Long Island, or under wherever she was when she wrote it.
Like the groups, Tea is women-only and identity-verified, so you can’t see it yourself. A Group Check doesn’t include Tea. If you want both searched, the Full Check covers Tea, the groups and your photos in one report.
Group Check · Long Island
Know for certain.
A researcher searches the groups by hand and sends you a plain yes or no, with the evidence if there is any. We never post, comment or contact anyone, and nobody can see that you searched.
Long Island questions
(05)I live in Suffolk but work in Manhattan. Should the city groups be checked too?
It’s usually worth it. Men who commute often date in both places, and a post could appear in either. A Long Island check already includes the main New York City groups.
I only spend summers out east. Would I be in the Long Island group?
Possibly. Women from the city and from the Island both spend summer weekends in the Hamptons and on Fire Island, and either might post in her home group. We search the Long Island and New York City groups, which covers both.
Is the Long Island group mostly Nassau or Suffolk?
It covers both, with members from the city line out to the Forks. We don’t need to know your county to search it, but it helps to tell us where you live and where you’ve been dating.
Nearby cities
All cities →New Haven
How the New Haven group works, and what we search there.
See the New Haven page →New York
How the New York group works, and what we search there.
See the New York page →Jersey City
How the Jersey City group works, and what we search there.
See the Jersey City page →Hartford
How the Hartford group works, and what we search there.
See the Hartford page →Not sure which group you’d be in? The Group Check covers wherever you live and date, listed here or not.
